Hello, moto!

Hello world! Can you believe I'm still out here? Sorry for the HUGE
delay... looks like nursing school got the better of me, eh? Well, I'm
back! And although I'll do my best to try and update this rag more often
this year, I'm not making any solid promises.

Had a GREAT first year of nursing school. Learned alots. Had no idea what
any of it meant, but it's all starting to come together a little bit at a
time. Like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. Spent the summer doing an
externship in the ICU. LOVED it. Think I'd like to work ICU after
graduation - maybe even PICU, though not sure how I'd handle that
emotionally. Plus, I'm not the greatest at hands-on type skills (drawing
blood, etc).... what an awful weakness to have in the nursing world! I'm
hoping that more experience during clinicals and preceptorship this last
year will ease that.

I'm just terrified to think, that in a year, I'll be out on my own - a real
RN! Wow!

More to come later. Tired now, and boys are in bed watching Kangaroo Jack.
Think I'll join 'em! :)

Asses mint

Ding! Ding! Ding! Let the stress begin!

Our classes this fall are CPR, Assessment, Med Surg and Clinical and Pharmacology.

We were assigned 7 chapters to read tonight. Tomorrow all day we'll be talking about assessment and a little bit of nutrition review. I'm worried my kids are going to see more of the front of a textbook than they are my face for the next 2 years.

You know I said I thrive on stress? Let me take that back. All I wanna do right about now is go crawl in a whole somewhere. I am so overwhelmed.

We complete Med Surg this semester, next semester we have some Peds, Psych, Maternal-Child/L&D/OB-gyn.

Clinicals for us will begin mid-September with bed baths/oral hygiene/etc. I may need to brush up on my technique - I'm not sure I can remember how to fold the washcloth correctly. And another thing that gets is is hospital/mitered corners. I've always said that academics I usually have little problems with, but the technical/mechanical stuff gets me everytime. So during the summer term, after asking my partners to show me several times how to do the mitered corners and still not "getting it," I gave up to save myself further embarrassment (temporarily)! Help!

Problem - I haven't ordered my uniforms OR my shoes yet. Financial aid refunds haven't come in yet. Anybody else see the problem here? I'm just hoping that once I do get my aid money, the uniform shop will have my size in stock!

The hospital I'll be doing my clinical at this semester is about 60 miles from my home. I'm not going to complain about that, since some clinical sites would be as far as 120 miles from my home (we'll rotate through all sites by the time I graduate though, so that's something I'll have to look forward to?).

I don't know when I'm going to get any studying or housework done this week. I have a weekend leadership conference I have to attend for a scholarship I received Friday night and all day/into the evening Saturday. I'm a little nervous about it, since it's at a woodsy retreat-type place, and I have a feeling we'll be doing those "climb the wall/ropes course" type of exercises they make you do at summer camp to learn teamwork. I'm not really excited about it, since I'm socially awkward and unbelievably shy. I even told the scholarship committee as such (listed it as my weakness), but for some reason they still deemed me suitable to receive a leadership scholarship.

Ordinarily students who receive the above mentioned leadership scholarship have to enroll in a leadership course. Our nursing schedule is pretty much 8-5, Monday-Friday, so it obviously conflicts with that. In place of the course, I then have to read two leadership related books and complete essays on them. Additional scholarship requirements are keeping up the GPA, being involved in 2 leadership sponsored events on campus each semester, being active in 2 campus clubs, and donating time to 2 community service organizations. I'm beginning to wonder if all this work is really worth $500/semester! I'll take what I can get.

Mastery exams - We have a Med Terminology exam next week that we MUST pass with 85% or we're out of the program. I've noticed since we've returned to class that I'm not the only one who's a procrastinator. Hardly anyone has studied for it. We also have a pharmacology calculation exam toward the end of the semester that we MUST pass with 95% or we're out of the program. The lowest possible grade you can make and continue in the program at all is a 75%. Another note is that points are not rounded up AT ALL - if you make a 74.9, you've still failed. Of course, I'm not aiming for C's, but still - oh the pressure! Maybe I'm a little too grade conscious/gunner.

First day, all morning we had a convocation that included junior and senior levels students in the program. It was held in a VERY nice auditorium in the brand spanking new Math & Science building on campus. We all watched some poorly dubbed videos regarding hospital policies - HIPAA, JCAHO, etc. I think most of us had a hard time staying awake! I guess I wasn't the only one who enjoyed sleeping late during break! ;)

Speaking of those videos, who knew trash could be so complicated? Green bags, red bags, blue bags, white bags, brown bags. What's next, polka-dot bags? Then add to that codes - code green, code blue, code red, code yellow, code adam, code true, code secure. And let's not forget the armbands - blue armbands, royal blue armbands, green armbands, black armbands, hot pink with "confetti" armbands. Am I ever going to be able to keep all this straight?

Is nursing (school) really just about making something that seems so simple incredibly, unbelievably complicated? I guess not, just all this information seems so alien to me right now. So much information is being thrown out at us, that I'm overwhelmed to say the least. Can I even do this?

They're renovating a building on campus for the nursing department. They've gutted the entire inside, so it will be totally new when completed. I'm excited to say that the scheduled date for completion of that project is next summer, so if all goes as planned our senior year will be spent in the nice, new facilities.

I'm finally becoming more comfortable around my classmates, and will fully admit to being a little judgmental of them in the beginning. The other older gal and I have decided that we still don't quite "fit" (while other students are standing in the hall talking during breaks, we kind of stay to ourselves), but I'm okay with that. The age thing doesn't seem like such of a barrier anymore when we're working together. Out of 60 classmates, I'd say I know about 30 people's names, but I'm working on learning them all!

The instructor's have joked that we're a very punctual and mature class (especially to be so young, on average), and it's kind of amusing that after 3 weeks off, we returned and sat in exactly the same seats we occupied during summer term. I guess we're really creatures of habit. :)

Parent orientation at my son's school is tonight. He'll be beginning first grade on Wednesday, his teacher is a cousin of mine and she actually taught me first grade years ago. She's known for her strictness, let's say. I'm pretty concerned about this, since my son made all C's in Conduct his kindergarten year. They also have a VERY small class - only 9 students (I think her reputation preceded her, there were 21 students in his Kindy class last year).

My son (6) keeps stealing the remote and hiding it in the windowsill. I'm not sure what he's hoping to accomplish, unless it's to keep me from turning the cartoons off. I'm sure he'll be glad to know that Mama ain't gonna have any time to watch TV anytime soon!

My other son (2 1/2) goes for a repeat X-ray of his broken left clavicle on Wednesday.

The expenses in nursing school just don't ever end. After going through our class syllabi this afternoon, we realize there are 3 more LARGE (read: expensive) textbooks that were omitted from our required book list but ARE required. I have to find another $124 by the end of the week (nevermind that financial aid refunds aren't available until September 10th).

$59 of that is for the MEDS program. It really is a neat program and provides us with computerized (internet-based) tests for most all of our nursing subject content areas. Our nursing instructors have also agreed to give us up to 2 points on our final course grades if we pass certain MEDS tests with a certain percentage. After paying $59 x 4 (semesters), at the end of our senior year they will provide us with a 4-day board review. When you think about it that way, that's really a bargain compared to Kaplan or some of the similar programs out there. Those things are pricey!

The other $65 is for a skills/clinical pack. That includes things like an IV kit, syringes, gloves, and a cath kit. These are the things we use in our skills labs and check-offs.

I missed my appointment at the health department last week to get my final Hepatitis shot. I guess I'll try to find time to do that at the student health center on campus (it's located in the nursing building), I just hope it isn't too expensive!

And people wonder why nursing students are stressed out!

I guess I'm pretty silly, but instead of writing my journal out daily and then typing it into the computer, I've started recording my thoughts on the commute home into my little tape deck and then transcribing them into text. That probably explains the additional length of this (and possibly future) posting(s).

I want to have a whole separate category in my budget just for coffee. Oh, I'm so addicted. My current weakness is a Tall Skinny Iced Hazelnut Latte. I'd like to have one every morning, but for now I settle for a couple days a week! Funny thing is, I have an espresso machine, I'm just too lazy to learn how to use it (or get up early enough to make my own)! My philosophy is, why bother to make it myself when I can pay someone else to do it for me? (I wish I was rich enough to transfer this to some other areas of my life - mainly housework!)

Did I mention I almost flipped my truck the other day? I have a Jeep Liberty, and you know what they say about Jeeps and rollover risk. Some redneck hillbilly truck pulled out in front of me and I had to swerve QUICKLY (two wheels came off the ground) to keep from rear-ending him and his toothless friends riding in the bed. My husband and two kids were in the car and it scared us all silly. Reminds me of another of my pet peeves: people driving tractors or ATVs on paved roads (isn't that illegal?).

I'm such a control freak. I think that's why I have issues about driving on the highway/freeway. Or maybe I'm just paranoid instead. Another problem with my driving may be that I'm nearly blind in one eye (poorly treated lazy eye when I was a kid), which happens to be my left eye. I suppose you can understand why decreased peripheral vision would be a problem when it comes to merging, etc.

Sorry this wasn't too clever or too quick, but I'm glad to have you reading! You guys are what keeps me posting.

I'm not sayin' I'm a saint, I just don't wanna live that way

Just got off the phone with from a brief talk with my husband.  In case anyone doesn't know, because of his job he lives in a town two hours away.  He supports us financially, but isn't able to be here very often.  The kids and I decided to stay here since I'd already been accepted to the nursing program, and get lots of support/help from my parents/grandparents who live nearby.  My husband works an odd schedule and it would probably make nursing school difficult with the odd hours/having to get kids to daycare or school.  In addition, the nursing program near his city is a 3-year program, and the one I'm currently enrolled in is a 2-year program.  If I finish here, I'll graduate in May 2006.

 

We're probably both being unreasonable.  He wants me to quit school (give up my scholarships), re-apply to the college over there, and move right away.  I want to stay here and finish.  We still see each other on weekends and holidays, and I'm willing to make the sacrifice to finish up here as quickly as possible.  I'm ready to have my degree NOW, and this is the first time in our 6-year marriage that I've really been able to concentrate on what I want (an education).

 

Needless to say, this is causing a huge rift between us.  He's even threatened that if I don't move over there ASAP, I might as well call a divorce lawyer.  That's not what I call unconditional love, but does anyone think I'm being unreasonable?  Any input or advice would be appreciated.  Maybe I and the people I've been asking for advice are just not objective enough.

 

As if this day weren't bad enough, the two-year old decided to do his egg-throwing trick again.  This time it was only a half-dozen, but still - what a mess!   Yuck! 

 

The weather today seems to match my mood.  Dreary and gray...  nothing much to do today except clean out my truck and backpack since school starts back tomorrow (say a little prayer that I won't sleep through my alarm), get some clothes washed, and go up to my Mom's to print out all my syllabi/etc since my printer seems to be on the fritz. 

Rawhide

School days are approaching again far too quickly.  In a way, I long for the routine and drama of school.  Although I'm at once both a perfectionist and a procrastinator, I find I'm much more productive when I'm pressed for time.  I've always told my friends/family/coworkers that I thrive on stress....

 

So we start back Monday.  I went and bought all 21 of my nursing textbooks last week for a total of $707.34.   That price actually wasn't as bad as I'd feared.  I have yet to order my uniforms or shoes, and since clinicals begin in September I suppose I'd better do that very soon.  I already have the rest of my supplies on hand (steth, BP cuff, etc) since we used those during summer term.

 

I wrote up some flashcards to help me with my last minute cramming for the med terminology mastery exam we have to take on September 2nd.  I already have over 400 cards and I'm not done making them yet.  Guess I should have started studying sooner.  :)

 

 

Never trust a toddler

I made myself cheese toast at 11:30 pm last night.  Killer for the diet, but oh so tasty.

 

The unseasonably nice weather earlier this week I could handle, the thunderstorms not so much so.  It was coming a gusher outside last night making me tense.  If I was in bed, I'd probably be snoozing like a baby since I love to sleep when I hear the rain on the roof.  But sitting in my living room, alone, with the rain pelting hard on the windows, I get kind of frightened.  Ridiculous?  Maybe.  A very vivid fear?  Absolutely. 

 

What is it with men?   Er, make that boys - apparently they're just miniature men.  Not only did Dusty (6yo) put an empty container of orange juice back into the fridge (hello, what do you think the garbage is for?)....  he also snuck into the kitchen, removed the tub of chocolate chunk cookie dough from the fridge, and took it to his room to help himself with both hands (the incriminating evidence was found by me upon visiting his room to turn out the light).   Ugh! 

 

Remember I told you that my 2 year old, Micah, is a holy terror?   Well, as if I needed further proof, he's tested my patience this morning.  Dusty came and interrupted my shower to tell me Micah threw an egg on the (newly mopped) floor.  I groan, cut my shower short, and head to the kitchen still in my towel, only to find that there are nearly a dozen eggs cracked and thrown across the whole kitchen.  Ugh!   I could just pull my hair out!

 

More from the Micah chronicles.  Upon taking a bath this evening, I find he has taken every single item of clothes that was in the bathroom hamper and dunked them into the bathtub.  Are all two year olds this bad, or is it just me? 

 

Had a very nice night, though.  Some church members and friends threw a party for a former classmate/friend who just recently got home after serving 15 months in Iraq (Army).  He has some interesting stories to tell for sure.  man

 

~*~Manna~*~
Mama to sweet boys Dusty (8-7-98) and Micah (1-28-02)
MUW BSN Class of 2006!!!!!!!

Whose line is it anyway?

Where have I been? Enjoying myself and not even turning the computer on except to download my e-mail or occasionally listen to Dave (daveramsey.com)

Lots going on with us, though. This is just going to be a random mishmash of what's been going on with us the past two weeks.

The first week off I was entirely lazy and did absolutely nothing but have the satellite man reconnect our DirecTV and sit on my butt, eat bon-bons, and watch TV. Well, not literally... but close enough. I figure I deserved the break, right? :)

We made a trip to the big waterpark over at the casinos here. Silly me, put sunscreen on the boys, but didn't on myself. I blistered horribly, and nearly had a panic attack itching so darn bad. It was fun and wish we could go back, but they're closed after this weekend for the season. Maybe I can talk someone into getting us season passes for next summer.

I really need a date. With my husband, of course. I'd like to go out, have a couple of drinks, or some food, or something. I love my boys and am so happy to get to spend this time with them, but my husband and I see each other so little and I'd really like some time to just concentrate on him. Know any good babysitters? LOL

My Father in law had a wreck. He was drunk at "deer camp" and decided to drive. I have absolutely no tolerance for people who drink and drive - my mother's youngest and only sister was killed by a drunk driver when I was 3. I know my mother in law reads this and I apologize to her for this rant, but that's just how I feel. I've always espoused the motto that it's better to be honest than nice.

We're really pleased that my husband's twin brother has moved "home" to Mississippi from Tennessee and we're finally getting to see him and his 7-year-old daughter more often.

Dustin (my oldest son) had a birthday and turned 6 on August 7th. It was a great day with two little parties (just family) two cakes, and lots of nice presents. With two sets of grandparents and one set of great-grands, my kids are spoiled rotten. He starts 1st grade on August 25th (private school).

Micah (my youngest son) is 2 1/2, for those who don't know. We're working on the potty training thing, but it's not going so well. He is very, very stubborn - not at all like Dusty, who at 2 1/2 was docile and wouldn't jump when you said "how high." Did I mention he's also still nursing (at night)? I'm all for extended breastfeeding, but sometimes ya need some personal space! Yeesh. He's very attached though, so I just keep hoping he'll decide to give it up himself...

In other news, I broke Micah's collarbone last week after a nice trip to the mall and Chuck E Cheese. :( We were walking through the bookstore, I holding his hand, when he did that "I don't wanna go so I'm just going to be a limp noodle" thing that toddlers do. This left him hanging by me holding his arm for a split second. I heard something go "crunch" and I dropped him. He was screaming and wouldn't use that arm, so since he'd dislocated his elbow once before we figured it was that again. My wonderful, sweet brother who is an ER physician told my hubby over the phone how to try to put it back in place, so we tried that and couldn't get it in. Then we drove to my brother's house and they proceeded to push and pull on it even more to try to put it back in, but never felt it pop back in place. He said if he wasn't using it by the next morning to take him for an X-ray, and sure enough - broken left clavicle. Ouch. So he has this nifty little brace he hates wearing, and he goes back for a repeat X-ray Wednesday the 25th.

The big "Little Sturgis" (sturgismsbikerally.com) bike rally is this weekend. Gami (my mother) bought the grandkids rebel and American flags to wave at the bikers as they pass down the highway in front of her house tomorrow afternoon. I'd like to go, a first cousin of mine builds custom choppers (southernfriedchoppers.ms) and is going to have a booth, but hubby has to work so I don't guess I'll be going alone. LOL

Kevin (hubby) took a few days of vacation and was home with us while I've been off. It was SO nice to see him for all that time. Just having him around is great.. . he's pressuring me very hard to move/transfer schools over there to where he lives, but I'm putting up a lot of resistance. That's a subject for another post..

We cleaned out closets and ended up with 8+ bags of clothes and things to take to the Salvation Army. There is absolutely no way that I or my kids needed that many clothes. I feel so free! Decluttering rules! :)

Went and bought my books earlier this week. 20 books and $700 worth. Thank goodness for book vouchers. I won't be able to get my financial aid refund until September 10th (even though school starts August 23rd), but I have to have my uniforms for clinicals in September and I haven't ordered them yet. Considering I'm broke, this is a big problem. Oops.

We had a big family reunion last weekend, with unseasonably pleasant weather because of the hurricane on the coast. Sorry guys, but I'd take weather like that in August anytime! Got to see lots of relatives I haven't in ages, including my Uncle who drove down from Cincinnatti (sp?) for a visit. Dusty is incredibly like me and stood in the bathroom for the better part of the beginning of the reunion, too shy to go out and mingle with his other kid-cousins who he rarely sees. How can I prevent my child from being cursed with the same shyness and social phobias as his mother? Which leads on to another interesting note, that poor self esteem very much runs in families. Summer term nursing school factoid of the day. :)

My sweet Grandma decided to buy my boys bunk beds for an early Christmas present (plus I think she secretly wants them both to stop sleeping with me). We got them put up a day or two ago. They're black metal and look great, and better yet - the boys love them! Now if only I could get Dusty over his fear of the dark and Micah over his needing milk to go to sleep...

School starts back August 23rd. I'm both excited and terrified. Mommy!

Okay, that's all for now, I'm sure I'll have more later. Thanks for reading, comments are welcome... oh if you e-mail me through this site and would like a reply, please include your return e-mail address since they come through my box blind (not showing your return addy).

The winner is...

Me. I'm proud of myself. No, I'm not bragging, I'm improving my self concept. See, I did learn something this session? LOL

I ended up with A+ in all three of my classes.

I guess I didn't mention our nursing informatics class much. That one was entirely online and included us doing a research critique from a nursing journal, searching out a useful website for nurses and writing a quick blurb about it (I chose allnurses.com of course), a nursing history paper (did mine on Margaret Sanger), and something else that I can't seem to remember at the moment.

The last two tests for my other two courses were more difficult than the first two. Like I said, apparently they're easing us into this nursing test thing. I'm worried about the fall, considering the average class score on the test on elimination/mobility was lower than an 80. Eek!

Oh well, I'm doing, and going to fully enjoy myself for the next 2 weeks until school starts back up. Who knows if I'll actually get anything done, although I have a big, huge, long to-do list laid out. This is the first time I've really ever actually been able to be a semi-SAHM to my boys (ages 6 and 2), so I'm looking forward so much to that quality time with them. :)